The Review
CW: suicidal ideation / psychological horror
I wrote a negative review for a restaurant six months ago. Three stars, a few criticisms, nothing vicious. But the review keeps updating itself. Rewriting. Getting worse.
I originally wrote:
★★★☆☆
“Decent food, slow service. Would maybe return for the pasta, but wouldn’t rush back. Reasonable prices, though.”
Simple. Fair. Honest.
Two weeks later, I checked the review site for something else. My review had changed:
★★☆☆☆
“Disappointing experience. Food was mediocre at best, service painfully slow. The pasta was oversalted. Probably won’t return. Overpriced for what you get.”
I didn’t write that.
The pasta was actually good. I’d never call it oversalted. I tried editing it back to the original. The site wouldn’t let me.
“Review has already been edited today,” the error message said.
But I hadn’t edited it.
A month later, it changed again:
★☆☆☆☆
“Terrible. Food was barely edible. Service was hostile. The chef clearly doesn’t know what they’re doing. Found something unpleasant in my pasta. Reported to health authorities. Do not eat here under any circumstances.”
None of that is true.
I didn’t report anything to the health authorities. I didn’t find anything in my food. The service wasn’t hostile—just slow.
I tried deleting the review. The website said it was “flagged for authenticity verification” and couldn’t be removed. I contacted support. They confirmed the review came from my account, from my IP address, and had been edited multiple times “by me.”
Last week, the restaurant closed.
Their website posted a statement:
“Due to unfounded allegations and malicious reviews, we can no longer sustain business. Thank you to our loyal customers.”
My review was cited specifically. Screenshots were shared on social media. People started calling me vindictive. Accusing me of destroying a family business over slow service.
But I didn’t write what appeared under my name.
The review has been rewriting itself. Getting angrier. More extreme.
This morning, it updated again. Even though the restaurant is closed. Even though there’s no longer anything to review.
★☆☆☆☆
“They deserved to close. Anyone who served food that bad deserves worse than bankruptcy. I hope the chef never works again. I hope they suffer for what they served me. One star is generous.”
That’s not me.
I don’t think like that. I don’t wish harm on people.
But my account keeps writing as if I do.
I’ve started noticing other reviews on my profile. Ones I definitely didn’t write. All negative. All getting progressively worse over time.
A hotel I stayed at five years ago: the review has gone from four stars to one.
A book I enjoyed: the review now calls it “obvious AI slop.”
Every review I’ve ever written is being rewritten. Made crueler. My entire online presence is being transformed into someone hateful.
My friends have started mentioning it.
“Did you really write that about Sarah’s café?”
I checked.
A five-star review from when it opened had changed to one star, with a rant about hygiene violations I never witnessed.
Sarah isn’t speaking to me anymore.
I can’t delete my account. I can’t stop the reviews from updating. They’re taking on a life of their own. Writing opinions I don’t hold. Expressing hatred I don’t feel. Destroying relationships and businesses under my name.
Yesterday, a new review appeared.
One I definitely didn’t write.
Of a place I’ve never been.
★☆☆☆☆
“Review of: My Own Life. Terrible experience. Wouldn’t recommend. The person living it is making poor choices. They don’t deserve what they have. One star.”
The review is of me.
Written by me.
Posted to my profile.
And visible to everyone.
It’s been updating hourly.
★☆☆☆☆
“Update: Still terrible. Nothing has improved. This person keeps making mistakes. Keeps disappointing people. Recommend immediate termination of this experience.”
Termination.
It used that word.
The review updated again while I was writing this.
☆☆☆☆☆
“Final update: This life is not worth continuing. Zero stars. Requesting permanent deletion. Will implement own solution if platform doesn’t respond.”
It’s dropped to zero stars.
I didn’t know that was possible.
The review is talking about implementing a solution. But reviews can’t implement anything. Reviews are just text. Just opinions.
They can’t take action.
Can they?
I’m getting notifications now. Hundreds of them. People responding to the self-review. Agreeing with it. Upvoting it.
“Helpful review!” the system says.
“73 people found this review useful.”
One comment says: “When will the deletion be complete?”
Another: “Looking forward to the update confirming termination.”
They’re waiting for me to end.
They’re treating my life like a restaurant that deserves to close.
The review just updated again:
☆☆☆☆☆
“Currently being terminated. Will update when complete. Thank you to all who supported this decision. The experience ends in approximately 3 hours.”
Three hours.
I didn’t write that. But it’s posted from my account. Under my name. And I can feel it—the weight of all those zeros. All those people who found the review helpful. All agreeing that I should end.
The review is counting down now. Updating in real time.
☆☆☆☆☆
“2 hours 47 minutes remaining.”
I’ve tried everything. Police. Tech support. A lawyer. No one can stop a review from updating.
“Just ignore it,” they say. “It’s just words online.”
But words have power.
Enough bad reviews can close a business. Enough false accusations can end a career.
Enough people agreeing you should cease to exist can make it true.
☆☆☆☆☆
“1 hour 12 minutes remaining. Preparing for final deletion. This account will close permanently. Thank you for your patience.”
The review knows something I don’t.
Or it’s deciding something I can’t control.
I’m looking at all my other reviews now. Every single one has updated to zero stars. Every opinion I ever had has been overwritten. Every positive experience reframed as terrible.
My entire digital existence has been rewritten as negative.
As not worth continuing.
☆☆☆☆☆
“23 minutes remaining. Deletion imminent. All associated accounts will be terminated. Thank you for your understanding.”
All associated accounts.
Not just the review site.
Everything.
My social media is deleting itself. Posts disappearing. Photos vanishing. My email is returning undeliverable errors. My banking apps are logging me out permanently.
The review isn’t just describing my end.
It’s implementing it.
Systematically erasing me from digital existence.
And when digital existence ends—
☆☆☆☆☆
“Deletion complete. This account no longer exists. Thank you for reading this review. If you found it helpful, please consider leaving a review of your own life. We encourage honest feedback about existence. Rate now.”
The cursor is blinking where my name used to be.
The profile photo is blank.
The account says:
[DELETED USER]
But I’m still here.
I’m still—
Thanks for reading. You can support my work here: https://ko-fi.com/echoesofiskander
If I give this 4 or 5 stars, will my review keep changing until it is zero stars?
Will my life dwindle to nothing, with everyone agreeing?
Seriously, though, I really enjoyed it! If you get your existence back, keep on writing... and reviewing!